Vendredi, 10 mai 2013

AGRESSEUR AGRESSÉ

Est-ce qu’il vous arrive de vous demander pourquoi des gens se trouvent sur notre trajet en une magnifique journée printanière?

 
Des gens qui ne seront dans notre vie pour quelques heures et pourtant, leurs histoires ne nous laisseront pas indifférents. L’histoire de Paul doit ressembler à celle de plusieurs… Mère abusée qui fut abusive à son tour… J’attendais ma voiture au garage quand j’ai croisé le locataire de l’un de mes clients. En le saluant, il est venu me faire un brin de jasette. Il me racontait qu’il devait changer de logement, car sa fille Jessica habiterait avec lui à partir du mois d’août. Jessica a été abusée sexuellement par son beau-père, il est en prison maintenant. « C’est la DPJ qui s’occupe d’elle pour l’instant », m’a-t-il dit spontanément.

« C’est triste », ai-je répondu, ne voulant pas faire intrusion dans sa vie privée.

« J’ai toute la misère au monde à arriver en ce moment, car je dois continuer à payer la pension à la mère et le centre dans lequel Jessica se trouve. Je fais des heures supplémentaires à mon travail, mais comme j’augmente mon revenu, je dois payer plus au centre. C’est un cercle vicieux que j’ai hâte de régler, car une fois tout payé, j’ai à peine de l’argent pour l’épicerie. Bientôt, j’aurai la garde complète de Jessica, alors ma situation financière va s’améliorer, je n’aurai plus à payer aux deux endroits », me raconte-t-il.

J’étais surprise qu’il s’ouvre ainsi à moi, car c’était personnel.

« Je sais ce que c’est d’être abusé pour l’avoir été! », a-t-il renchéri.



Dans son enfance, sa mère avait abusé sexuellement de lui et de sa sœur. Il s’était replié sur lui-même jusqu’à ce que la « soupape » saute! À quinze ans, il a téléphoné à la police pour dénoncer celle qui lui avait donné la vie. Elle a été diagnostiquée « bipolaire ». Elle n’a jamais avoué ses torts, préférant souligner qu’elle avait une maladie mentale. « Il n'y a rien là, avait-elle dit à la police, mon oncle me faisait vivre la même chose! » Paul a poursuivi son chemin dans un centre pour adolescent, jusqu’à ce qu’il devienne adulte.

« J’ai été en thérapie pour ne pas recréer le modèle familial. Quand j’ai rencontré celle qui allait devenir la mère de Jessica, j’ai cru que tout irait bien et que nous aurions une belle vie ensemble. Je l’ai beaucoup aimé, mais ça n’a pas fonctionné. Elle a refait sa vie avec l’agresseur de ma fille. Je me suis senti impuissant. Ma fille n’avait pas à vivre le même enfer que moi. On nous a volé ce qu’il y avait de plus beau en nous, notre innocence. Nous avons pardonné à nos agresseurs et à ceux qui ne nous ont pas protégés… »

Paul me racontait son histoire tout bonnement. J’étais peinée pour lui et Jessica. Il aimerait que j’écrive son histoire pour en faire un livre. Bientôt, il espère pouvoir s’acheter un ordinateur et installer le câble chez lui. Bravo Paul pour ce don de soi. Ce n’est pas évident de s’ouvrir ainsi et j’espère que les gens victimes garderont l’espoir, car vous en êtes un modèle de détermination qui m’a inspiré ce billet!

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